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Inclusive Language in Birth Work: A Necessity, Not an Option

Words that can heal or harm


In birth work, every word can be a balm or a wound.


As doulas, we carry immense power: the power to name things truthfully, to open space, to include. That power isn’t just in what we say, but also in the silences we choose. We know that every word can feel like an open door or a door slammed shut.


Power means responsibility. And in our practice, closing a door can weaken a path to birth. It weakens parenthood. It weakens the path to parenthood.


In this blog, I want to share with you why inclusive language is not a linguistic whim, but a vital issue in perinatal care and how, concretely, we can adopt it in our daily practice.



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When exclusion becomes violence


Let me be direct: we need to stop pretending that “pregnant woman” is a neutral term. It isn’t. Every time we settle for it, we erase a whole spectrum of realities. Pregnant people exist. They are cis, trans, non-binary, fluid, queer. They deserve to be seen, respected, and supported without having to re-educate every perinatal professional they meet.


Using inclusive language in perinatal care is not about being “woke” or militant. It’s a practice grounded in evidence. Research is clear: when people feel fully recognized, they access care more easily, experience less stress, and build deeper trust with their caregivers.


On the flip side, being constantly misgendered or faced with gendered language increases distress and disconnection from care. It’s a form of obstetric violence, subtle, but very real. Misgendering leaves a wound that lingers.


"But doesn’t inclusive language erase women?"


Let’s be clear: no.


Saying “pregnant people” doesn’t erase women, it simply makes space for others too. It’s additive, not subtractive.


Social psychology research is unambiguous: exclusive language creates ostracism. Women report feeling less legitimate, less represented. Inclusive language, on the other hand, increases the mental visibility of all groups. Nobody disappears.


Using terms like “pregnant people” widens the circle. We don’t erase, we expand. What erases is silence.


Five ways to bring inclusivity into your practice


Ready to shift the paradigm? Here are five practical steps you can take today, from the simplest to the most committed.


1. Words

Use neutral or additive terms: “pregnant people,” “parents,” “support people.” Keep “women” and “mothers” for when it’s accurate and requested. Flexibility is key. The goal isn’t to impose, but to reflect the reality of the person in front of you.


2. Posture

Introduce yourself using your pronouns. It makes others feel safer sharing theirs. Ask which words someone uses for their body or their parenting role. This simple gesture communicates: “I see you, and you matter.”


3. Tools

Update your website, intake forms, and social media posts. Every word and every image matters. Swap phrases like “supporting expectant moms” for “supporting pregnant people and their families.” Worlds are built in the details.


4. Dialogue

Dare to start the conversation with your colleagues. Don’t shy away from asking questions or being corrected. Explain your word choices, cite the research. Change feels normal when it’s explained with clarity and conviction.


5. Formation

Invest in your growth. For example, the QAD in collaboration with the The Coalition of LGBT+ Families, is offering a training on September 29th (only in frech). It’s a golden opportunity to go deeper, ask questions, and step out of the fog. Investing in this skill shows that your practice is rooted in dignity and respect.


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What about you ? What language shapes your practice?


Changing the way we speak feels awkward at first. But it’s profoundly liberating for those we support, and for us as doulas who believe birth work should be radically human.


Our words give birth too. Let’s make sure they bring into the world safer, fairer realities for everyone.


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So… What about you? How have you made your practice more inclusive? Share your experience in the comments, I’d love to hear how you’re transforming birth work from the inside out.



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